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Personally On the Juice
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Comedy 101
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Schizo Scott Returns
2006-01-23 22:15
by Scott Long

Will's post below, "Hip Hop, Bloggers, and The Voice of a Generation (Remix)" created some interesting discussion. One of the comments, by Knuckles, was a great point.

I think blogs are like rap in that we're nearing the point where the bloggers stop commenting on actual events, and simply start linking to each other's noncontent, and tossing insults around like battle-rap mixtapes.
One thing I like about The Juice is that we don't spend a lot of time breaking down what the major media has to offer. Considering that the beat writers have better contacts and more background information on the subjects they cover, I rarely spend time reading blogs which focus on taking apart the major newspapers. The best bloggers try to bring new takes on a subject, instead of just being a watchdog group.

Now in regard to the insults part, I don't run across many bloggers who throw insults out at other bloggers, unless they are political weblogs who have their right wing/left wing flame wars. In sports and entertainment weblogs, I actually think bloggers are too polite to each other, as we are way harder on newspaper writers than we are to writers in our own world.

I know many of you (and some of the other writers at The Toaster) would prefer for this site to be a more peaceful, nurturing place. When you put Will and I together that just ain't gonna happen. Both of us, to varying degrees, share the characteristics of being contrarians, sh*t-stirrers, and flame throwers. Just like rappers, we know the importance of being a self-promoter. If you live in Indianapolis and have any desires of being heard on a larger stage, you better have some talent and know how to shake and stir it up.

Every six months or so, I write a different version of what I see our site as being. I do this because is a different type of site. I'm not sure either one of us have a good handle on what we are doing here, but we strive to be unique. Sometimes this happens and sometimes it doesn't, as our regular readers are fully aware of. When you write at a site with another person you quickly realize seeing eye-to-eye on everyting isn't possible. When Will invited me to join in at Will Carroll Presents he was a Cub fan and he knew I was a White Sox guy. I guess we realized if we could get past that everything else would work itself out.

I know everytime I write one of these "Core Philosophies of The Juice" it reads very self-indulgent. Sorry, but writing a blog is about the most self-indulgent thing a person can do, so I don't worry about it. I know my favorite blogs give me some backstory on what the writer is like. The way I see weblogs competing with Newspapers and Magazines is that a blogger has enough column space to offer more than just the facts. Welcome to my daily memoir. Feel free to check my work and tell me when I'm off base. If only James Frey had a "Your Editor."


Continuing on the subject of self-promotion, did you notice that Will's new new writing project was headlining the front page of on Friday? It will be interesting to see how the Will Carroll science project proceeds. He's coming over to my house for dinner this week and I will be interested to see how he deals with the meal.

  • Pork chops stuffed with sweet apple and onion cornbread
  • Steamed green beans mixed with bacon and tomatoes
  • Garlic Mashed Potatoes

    and for dessert...
  • Oatmeal Crusted Apple Crisp topped with Vanilla Bean Ice Cream
On a related note, since the beginning of 2006, I have eaten horribly. From what I've been ingesting, you would think my New Year's resolution was to eat like a pig. Everyday I've eaten some kind of fast-food, plus chowing down on so many cookies my blood sugar level would read "OTIS SPUNKMEYER."

Now I know I'm not doing my health any favors. I watched Super Size Me last year and was repulsed by the changes in Morgan Spurlock's life from a month of pure fast food. While I was feeling repulsed, conversely my mouth salivated at the same time, watching him knock out burger after burger. I'm in reasonable shape, because I do a moderate amount of exercise, but my pants are getting tight and I'm expecting I will be hitting the Atkins diet again soon, as it's the only way I've found that I can lose weight and still feel full and reasonably satisfied.

I thought I would offer this up, as it seems to be the new rage in blogging. I will keep you posted occasionally on my diet plans. Will's target body type is Brian Giles. At the pace I'm going I will be looking like Rick Reuschel by the end of the year. Knowing this, my diet will probably start next month. My target body type will be Jose Canseco's. Hey, why work so hard using supplements. My motto, more results, half the time. Sure my testicles might go from kiwi's to bleached prunes, but I'm a positive thinker. Small cajones will just make Mr. Boffo look more intimidating.


Couldn't pass up sharing this New York Post offering from Page 6.

January 16, 2006 -- WHICH pop-singing sensation likes to troll the Internet for gay quickies? After one unsafe session, his homo hook-up contacted a tabloid to sell his sordid story and offered a DNA-encrusted washcloth as proof. If the truth comes out, the singing idol's fans, mostly middle-aged housewives, will be very upset . . . (Page 6 NY Post)
Now I have no idea who this could be, but I know who I don't think it is. Clay Aiken. From the comments I've gotten from Claymaniacs in the past, I've learned that Mr. Aiken is a raging heterosexual man, who is extremely well-hung. By the way, any sentence appearing in a major newspaper which features the phrases "homo hook-up" and "DNA-encrusted washcloth" will alway get linked or pasted on this site. In the world of gossip, no one is bigger than Dick Johnson and his crew of fluff artists.


Final Note: Now that the NFL on Fox pregame show is over, I will have a little more time to lend to The Juice. Another person who will have a little more time is Frank Caliendo. Check him out on Late Night with David Letterman tonight (Tuesday) He's will be doing a stand-up set.

2006-01-24 06:43:53
1.   TFD
re: "Your Editor" that assumes that The Juice's "your editor" had half the brains and ambition of the guys/gals at
2006-01-24 10:35:26
2.   Knuckles
For the record, that's me quoted at the top of this post, and I want to clarify that my comments were directed more towards greater blogdom in general than towards Baseball Toaster and the rest of (what I consider) the upper echelon of sports blogs. The recent hip hop thread reminded me somewhat of the non-sports blogs out there, where everyone seems to be in competition with each other to post the first link, or the snarkiest comment, etc. That's the kind of fat we have to slice through to find the steak- the blogs that capture our interest, and make us think about things in ways we might not have otherwise.

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